Month One

Weight/Length:  Hopefully quite a bit above birth weight by now. We’ll find out tomorrow. At his last weight check almost two weeks ago, he was 8lbs 1 oz, so still a few ounces away from birth weight.

Update: he was 9lbs 8oz!! That’s some good growth. Can’t believe he’s only an ounce bigger than D was when he was born.

Sleep: The entire first week of his life, I couldn’t tell what color his eyes were because he rarely opened them. Now, he’s more alert and even making eye contact with us, but he still sleeps most of the day. This would be great if it was CONSECUTIVE sleep but I’m lucky if I can get 4 straight hours at night. Usually it’s around 2.5-3 before he’s fussing to be fed. And speaking of fussing, this kid is FIDGETY. I remember D being a noisy newborn sleeper but this little guy takes it to a whole new level. I don’t even really use the monitor because I can hear him just fine without it.

Feeding: To my own amazement, we figured out nursing!! Of course, because of his weight issues early on, we had to introduce a bottle right away so I haven’t been off the hook with pumping. I probably pump about 3-4 times a day and he gets a bottle after most nursing sessions during the day. At night, he nurses and gets a big bottle before bed and then just nurses during his two middle-of-the-night wakeups. We supplemented with formula here and there the first two weeks but now that my milk is fully in, we haven’t had to use formula for the last two weeks and he’s really finally starting to chunk up a bit.

Firsts This Month: Everything is a first right now! First time meeting most of his grandparents, first trip to Target, first St. Patty’s Day, first trip to the park, first restaurant experience as a family of four…pretty much anything we do is a first.

Developments:  In the last week, he’s really started trying to master his head control when being held on our chest. He’s getting better at nursing and his physical appearance is looking less like a newborn, which makes me a little sad since he’s already outgrown newborn clothes and diapers.

Likes: I didn’t think we’d get so lucky the second time around with a baby that loved baths as much as D did, but we have! Sadly, with a toddler that requires bathing each night, we haven’t given him very many baths at all. I think we’re averaging about one a week right now. Other likes include his paci, his mobile, sleeping in the Boppy (which we only allow for naps), and more than anything – being held. I call him my little cuddle bug.

Dislikes:  Unlike his brother, he HATES diaper changes and cries almost every single time. He also hates it when we change his clothes, and dislikes being swaddled and sleeping flat on his back. I still put him in a sleep sack at night, but will typically leave at least one or both arms out.

What I’m Thankful For: A happy, healthy baby. I worked really hard to keep this one out of the NICU and I’m so glad it paid off. He’s perfectly healthy and I couldn’t be more thankful for that.

What I’m Looking Forward To:  Sleeping through the night!

How Mommy’s Doing: The first two weeks at home were ROUGH. I don’t remember having quite that much pain the first time around. Now that I’m 4 weeks out, I feel much better, though I still have moments where I’ll feel a twinge or burning sensation. Fortunately, it only last a couple of seconds.

At my follow-up appointment with my OB, she said everything looked great – my scar is healing nicely, my uterus is shrinking back down, and I’m cleared for exercise. Although, considering I get tired and sore just from walking for 20-30 minutes, I don’t see myself signing up for any marathons anytime soon.

My belly is still pretty big and the lower portion is still pretty tender, so clothes don’t fit and I don’t feel comfortable having anything even remotely tight around my belly. I’m looking forward to dress season.

But let’s talk about my boobs for a second. If I’m being completely honest, I kind of hate breastfeeding. I know I’m not supposed to say that because “breast is best” and whatnot, but it really sort of sucks. My boobs hurt most of the time; I have to wear nursing pads 24/7 or I’ll leak everywhere; I still have to pump a few times a day; I can’t go more than a couple of hours without having to nurse or pump – which means everything I do revolves around my boobs’ schedule; and I don’t care what anyone says – nursing is painful. It’s getting better, but it still hurts sometimes – especially the first 30 seconds or so that he latches, and that’s even WITH a nipple shield. And the gas. I don’t know why I assumed that babies who nurse rarely deal with gas but he swallows SO MUCH AIR when he’s nursing. So I spend roughly 20-30 minutes nursing and another 20-30 just trying to get him to burp. If he doesn’t burp? That pretty much guarantees spit-up or a fussy baby with a bellyache. Usually both. And I’m in desperate need of a massage after spending hours each day in nursing or pumping posture. All of that said, I’ll still continue this nursing journey, but I’m feeling a little cheated out of that blissful, harmonious, carefree nursing experience I’ve been sold by all the breastfeeding advocates out there. Maybe it will come in time, but right now? Not feeling it.

THIS is how I imagined it.

But THIS is how I feel.